Emily Maynard Gives Viewers Tears and Ulcers in Curacao

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Seeing Arie’s sweaty face as he described to Emily how he would slowly form a friendship with Ricki before diving into full on fatherhood, I realized that I was equally sweating during this episode.  One day after and my face is breaking out.  Not sure if this is my inner teenage hormonal mess, so caught up in Emily’s love for Jef, Arie and even Sean, but I can’t go on like this.  I really can’t remember a season where all final 3 guys seemed like they could be THE guy.  I think viewers are equally divided and for good reason.  Emily has a really tough decision to make.


Both this week and the week prior we saw recaps of Emily’s relationships with the remaining guys.  Not sure if they ran out of notable footage to show or they really think we all have short term memories.  Almost felt like we were getting a “Bachelorette for Dummies,” remix.  The good part about this is seeing if Emily’s take on the final 3 will at all give us a clue as to what her intentions are.  But as The Husband pointed out – the Curacao episode either had to be one of the best edited episodes of all time or Emily really could see marrying any of the guys.  How is this possible?

Sean’s Date with Emily:

Their remote island date seemed great, but such dates always worry me because what happens when they have to use the bathroom?  She’s also practically begging him to tell her that he’s in love with him, which she damn well knows already.  When she tells him that he’s hard to read, I had to roll my eyes.  It’s almost like the producers take Emily aside at the beginning of each date and give her a $10,000 bonus if she can get the guy to admit that he loves her.  Then he says it and this smile that comes out of her is almost like she’s humoring him.  It’s the kind of smile you use on people when they tell you something really silly and you don’t exactly understand, but you don’t want to be rude.  This smile is way different than the one she gets when Jef’s reading her a love letter and Arie’s within a 400 foot radius.  Even when Sean reads the letter to Ricki – the fact that this didn’t make her cry like a fool was the only clear evidence that he was going home.  Or maybe she didn’t like his dark salmon shorts.  That said, I felt so horrible for Sean during his departure speech both with Emily and then in the ride home.  He had no idea that he was going home.  Even Emily said to him, “I wished so badly that it was you.”  Not sure if that was comforting for him to hear or not.  In Emily’s blog this week, she says some really telling things about Sean:

Everything about Sean made me want to be with him in the end.  I wish I could pinpoint even one thing that would justify sending him home, but I still can’t.  The hardest part was knowing he felt so confident and didn’t see it coming.  He had no reason to, though, because I felt just as confident after our date.  I still wonder if Sean and I had had more time, if things would’ve been different…”

Oy. That’s gotta hurt whoever she picked if it ultimately is not Sean. Right?

 Things I loved:

  • No Overnights for Em! Brava to Emily on playing the lady card this week.  She is the FIRST Bachelorette (or Bachelor) in history NOT to stay overnight in the fantasy suites.  And somehow, it made me love her even more.  I loved that Jef pointed out all the reasons why they shouldn’t stay overnight in the suite – how their families were watching and she’s a mom, etc.  Even more awesome that Emily was annoyed she couldn’t turn him down.  But watching Emily in the private pool with Sean, large flotation devices / ostrich eggs in full display in a string bikini, you have to wonder what normally goes on in the fantasy suite? With Emily,  I’m sure nothing beyond kissing and some potential motor-boating, but golly – did you see those things?   The Husband was very convinced that they sat on top of the water and given their size, this is a very strong possibility.  To be explored in further detail at a later date (or maybe not).
  • That she literally can’t stop kissing Arie.  You’d think that even if she does pick Jef – how on earth is she going to explain her physical attraction to Arie?  And how can they all ever be in the same room again?  I agree with the commenter on my last post who brought up Emily’s angst with Brad over his physical chemistry with Chantal O’Brien.  While Emily isn’t having sex with Arie at this point (and let’s face it, it seemed pretty obvious there was some advanced activity that took place between Brad and Chantal in the tree house, because as I recall, Emily turned down the overnight aspect of their fantasy suite) not sure her desire to kiss him will stop just because she wants to shoot clay pigeons with Jef in Utah.
  • Her Arie Emotion. Did anyone else see how Emily had tears in her eyes when describing her thoughts about Arie?  She hands down loves that boy.  She even says, “He would make me feel good about me.  He would be my best friend.  He would love me forever.”  If she truly thinks those things about Arie beyond a doubt, I’m not sure her connection with Jef will override this.
  • Jef’s Take on Happily After After Including Ricki.  Jef’s line, “I hope to be the second biggest part of Emily’s life.”  Ahhh. This line shows great maturity from Jef. Makes me think he really understands that he’s marrying two people, not one, and that the focus will not be all about him and Emily.  Do we think his parents will be flown in for the finale??

Things to Consider:

  •  Emily drew an “Emily + ?” in the sand, but then the “+ ?” part got erased.  Is this foreshadowing?  Can we breathe a sigh of relief yet that she does get engaged at the end of this or are we all going to have heart attacks watching the finale?
  • Jef’s verbal poetry.  “I’m seeing the masterpiece that’s being painted…”
  • Jef: “The sun is setting here inCuracao, but for me and Emily, a whole life is starting.  CHEESE, but cute.
  • Jef: “I plan on spending every single night in our own little fantasy suite…there’s a time and a place…”
  • Jef Giving Her Chills / Jef Visuals. Emily says that she got chills when Jef told her that he loves her.  “Even though I couldn’t say anything back, he could tell from my face how I felt.”  Ummm, how could Jef not be our guy?  Then she says that Jef is the guy she pictures in the kitchen with her making lunch for Ricki.  Ummm, is that all?  Is it done?  Is Jef THE ONE? Will I have Jef vs. Arie anxiety for the rest of my life?
  • But then there’s Arie.  Sweet Arie.  Who she can’t keep her hands off of.  I love how he had his arm around her under water when she was nervous about the dolphins.  I love that he calls being around Emily like having your best friend next to you and you always want to kiss each other.
  • The fake ponytail extension hair piece is back for the final rose ceremony.  Why she would want to wear anything extra in that heat is beyond me.  Seeing her in a bikini – if I had her body – I would have done all rose ceremonies in a string bikini.

Emily’s dress at dinner with Jef can be described as Aztec sequin warrior style.  What I didn’t like, and probably the low point of the Curacao episode was Emily talking about moving and starting a whole new life with whomever she chooses.  I’m not sure it’s that easy and I don’t like Emily uprooting herself and Ricki for the guy.  Had they really not discussed up until this point where they would live?? Jef says he’s like to “go somewhere they could focus on each other.” Can that really be an option in Salt Lake Citywhere he’s already established and they’ll have a 6 year old with them?  This comes off as a bit naïve on Emily’s part, which makes me worried, because I do want this to work out of them!

When Emily came out in that white dress for dinner, I felt like she was going bridal on us.  Their conversation was very telling, though.  Their passion is at an A+, but what does he eat for breakfast?  What kind of toothpaste does he use?  Shampoo?  Is he a stomach or a back sleeper?  What’s his favorite color?  But Arie is happy to answer these types of questions and I like that he asked her about where they’d live.  Hearing Emily describe how Arie is “so good looking,” you have to wonder how on earth Emily is going to make this decision.  She’s passionate about both guys.  She loves both guys.  If she follows her heart, where will it take her?

Seeing Emily’s face during the Sean video seemed to say it all.  She was actually cringing.  And here’s what she must be thinking.  Sean is a solid choice.  He’s good looking.  He is head over heels for her.  He would be an incredible father.  But her feelings for the other two are much stronger and she knows that her relationships with Arie and Jef have a lot of passion.  As a single mom, she’s got to be wondering – what happens when that passion goes away?  Will Arie or Jef be a better person for her than Sean?  I don’t think Emily can answer that question, which is why she’s beside herself.

Then watching Sean talk about how much he’s going to miss her.  How hurt he is. How he still sees her as his wife…it’s like a puppy getting tortured.   I just can’t take it!

As for the Men Tell All, I kind of don’t care.  I want to know what the hell is going on with Arie and Jef.  I guess I want to see how Sean is doing, but otherwise who cares about Ryan and Kalon?  I’m going to have to do a supply check for the finale: tissues, acne cream, a handheld fan for the finale sweats and gloves so I don’t eat my nails off.   Chris Harrison promises it’ll be worth the wait.

What did you think??  Is Emily going to delay her decision?  Will she make her final choice at the live After the Final Rose?  Will she be married?  Pregnant?  Don’t forget the 3 hour finale is on Sunday, July 22nd.  We’re away that weekend and now have to make sure we get back in time.