'Bachelor Pad' Are You an Insider or an Outsider? (review)


The worst part is that I am getting sucked into this horrible web of manipulation and scandal.  I am still trying to figure out why Gia is so appealing to the guys.  I find her whiny.  Ok now I have your attention let’s take a look see.

(note: ‘Bachelor Pad’ Monday: Kisses, Sin City now 15 contestants)
After running through Central Park last night at dusk, an alluring idea when I started out on the run, I quickly came to realize that I should have checked the weather.  About 3/4 of the way through, the skies opened up and poured on me as my headphones were blasting Michael Jackson’s Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough.  This entire experience reminds me of Bachelor Pad.  In theory, it has the potential to be an interesting show.  Take all of the drama ridden characters from previous seasons, throw them in bikinis, make them all sleep together in one room and watch the fireworks start.  In reality, it’s an unexpected, unwelcomed drama fest about nothing.  Do I really care that Craig M was promised a rose on Gia’s date, but she ditched him for the “modern day Shakespeare” Wes?  Do I really need to see Krisily’s bump it during the rose ceremony as a statement that she’s modern and in it to win it?  And has Melissa Rycroft become the Vanna White of Bachelor Pad?
For some unexplainable reason, my digital recorder failed me last night.  Getting out of the shower, heating up the leftover Chinese food from the previous night, I was all set to curl up on the couch and watch Bachelor Pad’s nonsense unfold for week 2.  The Husband was off watching pre-season football with his buddies and after picking out my clothes for work, packing up my lunch, etc., I was all set.  Then I turn on the TV to find that to my horror, I had missed the first 40 minutes.  I was watching the very tail end of the Weatherman’s date.  It looks like Gia and Weatherman won whatever competition they had this week, making them safe from elimination this week.  Each got to choose three contestants to go on dates with and out of those three, one would receive a rose, making that person safe from elimination as well.  But somewhere along the way, and this is what I missed, the remaining contestants divided themselves into “insiders” and “outsiders.”  From what I could gather, the “insiders” are like the cool kids in high school. The cheerleaders and football studs.  The “outsiders” are like the mathletes in Mean Girls.  They’re really smart and down to earth, but less attractive overall (Gia is the exception) than the insiders.
With this thrilling division that took place, the remainder of the show revolved around strategy.  Who should the outsider mathletes vote off for the guys?  Their target was Kiptyn, but it backfired because Nikki likes the guy, and has morals.  Gia takes Craig M on her date, promises that he will get the rose, but then ends up giving it to Wes.  She is lured by Wes’s country charm and despite having a boyfriend it seems like Gia may go wandering in the upcoming episodes.  By the way, the highlight of the show was the preview for next week when Wes plays the same cheesy country song on his guitar for Gia that he played for Jillian on her season.  Did Gia not see Jillian’s season?  Doesn’t she know that Wes is a slimeball?  The guy is competing for $250,000, he is not interested in you, Gia!  Also, I was really annoyed that Gia was so upset with Nikki for going against the group and not voting Kiptyn out when Gia didn’t stick to the plan of keeping Craig M around. 

The worst part is that I am getting sucked into this horrible web of manipulation and scandal.  I am still trying to figure out why Gia is so appealing to the guys.  I find her whiny.  Jesse dumped Natalie for a chance of flirting with Gia.  Kovacs has a stage 5 clinger in Elizabeth, former Nanny, former brunette.  It is scary watching them together because I really feel like he had no choice but to shower with her.  Especially since last week she cried like a lunatic and declared her love for him, when he so clearly indicated he wasn’t interested.  Now he’s back playing the game, convincing her that he suddenly had a change of heart. I don’t buy it.

Jessie thinks she found love in bug eyed Dave, despite getting voted off.  I’m thinking there’s about a 1% chance of this working out and less chance than that he will remain faithful.  Other than that, what’s going on with Tenley and Kiptyn?  Is something going on? I think I missed the part where they got together.  I’m still confused as to why she started crying when Elizabeth mentioned Tenley’s relationship with Kiptyn.  Tenley needs a hug and tons of dance therapy.  She’s two for two in crying on this show.  She may be the MVP (Most Vulnerable Person) in the history of Bachelor history.
That’s really all that’s worth mentioning this week.  It was actually a painfully, uninteresting episode.  Who cares about which group will vote which person off?  The draw of the Bachelor/Bachelorette is the possibility of finding true love, the fantasy dates and watching the competition of the Bachelor/Bachelorette heat up.  It ain’t gonna happen on Bachelor Pad.  Especially, when the two dates this week were with (1) Weatherman, who nobody is interested in and (2) Gia – the girl with a boyfriend. 

The best thing that could happen on this show is if Chris L shows up and challenges Wes and Kovacs to an oil wrestling fight while Tenley performs an interpretative dance on the sidelines.  ‘Til that happens, Bachelor Pad is turning into one big yawn fest.

Stacey B